I feel pretty and witty and gaaaay

I, like my former cohort Mrs. Brainbombs have begun a similar transformation. I have decided that it's not enough to say that I'm going to better my depressing behavior but to actually do it. I have a few theories as to why I feel like a black hole will swallow me at any given moment and my son will be left to fend for himself in Florida with his father (perish the thought). The thought of that alone has driven me to change my outlook on life. So here is my plan.

Appearance (least important but, makes a difference): I have to say that I don't take much care of my outside appearance. I hate brushing my hair. I never wear makeup and I only just begun to pluck my eyebrows because some of my more feminine friends insisted that I become a "woman". (yeah, cause that's gonna do it.) My clothing is a little more exciting than a teacher for more than 15 yrs. I'm very basic and don't like loud colors. I stick to black, navy and occasionally throw in a splash of color but it's not often. I have a serious amount of shoes that I adore but I never wear them because I have nuthing to go with them. Not to mention I don't go anywhere either.

Attitude (now this one it hard but gratifying): I'm just down right surly some times. I don't want to be bothered if I'm not in a good mood. Ok, lots of people are moody but I am beyond reproach at times. I have devised a plan. When I wake up in the morning and I want to kill someone on site I TRY to smile or speak (preferable with someone I can stomach) or at least be approachable. I make myself smile (it hurts so bad) and laugh at things I wouldn't usually even allow to enter my space of consciousness. In other words I become engaging. No matter how much it hurts or how annoyed I become I smile.
I smile because people at my job have become intrigued as to why. They don't understand how I walked in with no expression on my face or a good morning from my lips in the past but now it's; HAHAHAHAAAAAA, or morning! Have a great day and all that jazz. I have really fucked them up with this transformation of myself and I have to say, I like it.